Rags
Ass Clowns Release New Single Exclusively on Edison Cylinder
Ever the innovators, controversial rockers The No Talent Ass Clowns have released their new single on an Edison cylinder… a format dead since the late 1910’s. Whisper to…
Vol. 1 • The official scandal sheet
The Rags
Ink, rumor, and residual legal fees
Rags
“Centralia concert will happen!” says band
Controversial rockers The No Talent Ass Clowns announced this morning that their aborted free concert in Centralia, PA will happen in the next few months. “I can tell…
Rags
Ass Clowns’ Manager & Roadie Found. Free Centralia Concert Cancelled.
A shaken Jerry Gold addressed reporters this morning shortly after being found wandering naked on a PA back road with Ass Clowns’ roadie “Rando” Miller. He seemed dazed…
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Ass Clowns’ tour van found empty outside Centralia–roadie, manager missing
A tour van that had traveled to Centralia, PA over the weekend to prepare for a free No Talent Ass Clowns concert on August 11 was found empty…
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Virgins Selected For Sacrifice at Centralia PA Concert
Legendary rockers The No Talent Ass Clowns announced the five girls who will be sacrificed as virgins at the conclusion of their controversial free concert in Centralia, PA…
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Ass Clowns Release New CD Amid Centralia Concert Controversy
With their controversial concert in Centralia, PA fast approaching, The No Talent Ass Clowns have released their newest CD entitled Express Elevator To Hell. According to industry insiders,…
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Controversial Centralia PA Concert May Draw 200
Legendary rockers The No Talent Ass Clowns say their free concert in the abandoned town of Centralia, PA on August 11 where they will sacrifice five virgins onstage…
Rags
Centralia, PA: Free Concert With Virgin Sacrifices
In a press conference aboard their tour blimp, controversial rockers The No Talent Ass Clowns announced they will perform a free concert in Centralia, PA on Saturday, August…
Rags
Band to Sacrifice Virgins During Upcoming Concert
Legendary band The No Talent Ass Clowns have something new for an upcoming concert–they plan to sacrifice five virgins live. “Yeah, we’re f-ing doin’ it!” said controversial front…
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Bass Player Carnage Smith Popular With Ass Clown Fans
“He’s f-ing nuts,” says front man Lars Gunblade. “The other day, he got completely drunk and belligerent during a weekend session, belittled the rest of the band, took…