By Chuck Chadwell
The new CD by rock superstar Lars Gunblade has been cloaked in secrecy.
Luckily, janitors at the record label are easy to bribe. I say easy but actually I’ll be sick every time I think about what I did to get this scoop. I hope you appreciate it because, whoa, it was a steep price.
Finally, after months of wondering what the new CD would contain, here are the tracks:
- Dumb as sand
- Let’s talk about me
- Your place or mine?
- Likin’ what I’m seein’
- Less talk, more action
- I finished, now get out
- There’s the door, use it!
If the video for “Dumb as Sand” is any indication, we’re in for a wild ride. Lars has never let us down before so we can expect lots of pointless aggression and no brainpower getting in the way. Some have said rock music should be gloriously and righteously dumb. If that’s the case, our man Lars is the glue that holds rock music together.