Joey Van Dundro
No Talent Ass Clowns drummer Joey Van Dundro was discovered early this morning at the New York City apartment of amateur singer Susan Alexander. He was confronted there by his wife, Emily Norton Van Dundro who held a press conference at 10am where she berated her husband and his infidelities. She also criticized his poor drumming abilities, especially on “Pucker Factor,” which Mrs. Van Dundro described as “phoned in.”
Van Dundro is still getting high approval ratings among fans, perhaps because they never liked the fact that Van Dundro secretly married Emily Norton in 2011. Ass clowns roadie and friend of Van Dundro, Jed Leland, said of the drummer, “All he ever wanted out of life was love. That’s the tragedy of Joey Van Dundro. You see, he just doesn’t have any to give.”
The news of Van Dundro’s adultery comes just weeks before the release of his first solo CD, which remains untitled at this time. What effect this news will have on sales of the new CD is impossible to predict.