Singer Lars Gunblade of The No Talent Ass Clowns got tired of having his custom Gibson Les Paul guitar stolen on tour. “Some guitarists take cheaper guitars and make them look like a Gibson,” said Gunblade. “I wanted to take the opposite approach because I figure I’m way smarter than they are. You can find a thousand webpages telling you how to make a Les Paul knock-off look like a genuine Gibson but there isn’t one website telling you how to do the reverse. We were in real uncharted territory with this project.”
Turning a Gibson Les Paul Guitar Into a Knock-Off
Gunblade asked Rando, his long-time guitar tech, to take his top-of-the-line Gibson Les Paul guitar and make it look like a cheap 1970s Korean knock-off. “It seemed like a crime,” said Rando. “It really offended me to do what I did to that custom Gibson Les Paul guitar. But I didn’t have any other choice really. Lars has some incriminating video of me that I wouldn’t want to go pubic. So I adulterated that beautiful f*cking Gibson Les Paul guitar. Now, it looks like a shitty bottom-of-the-line knock-off that you’d buy for 50 bucks at a used guitar store. But, hey, that’s what Lars wanted.”
“Hey, problem solved, man,” said Gunblade. “Nobody tries to steal this thing now. Why would they? You see, that’s how brilliant I am.”
“At first, I didn’t like the idea,” said guitarist Vas Defrens. “But now that nobody even tries to take the guitars told me that Lars, as usual, was right. I hate to admit that and I certainly wouldn’t tell him because he would become even harder to deal with than he is now.”
Other bands have not followed the Ass Clowns’ lead. When Foo Fighters front man Dave Grohl was asked if he will downgrade his guitar the way Lars Gunblade did, his only response was, “Who’s Lars Gunblade?”