Say hello… to mono! No Talent Ass Clown fans are shocked. Instead of slick production techniques in fancy studios, legendary rock band The No Talent Ass Clowns choose to produce Say Hello to My Posterior in mono.

“We were going for like zero separation, man!” says Ass Clowns front man, Lars Gunblade.

Fans have been less enthusiastic. The album has one of the highest negative ratings ever recorded for a music CD. No, Not There! Records has said that all reissues will be in stereo. “It was a dumb idea and we let Lars call the shots. That’s not gonna happen again,” says Rocco Cisco, president of No, Not There! Records.

“Rocco ain’t releasing this album in stereo!” says guitarist Vas Defrens. “We destroyed the stereo tracks. Suck it, Rocco!”

Meanwhile, the band is enjoying the “Say Hello to My Posterior” tour. “We have an image of a huge ass behind us on stage. We come on stage by crawling out of the butthole. It’s awesome,” says drummer Joey Van Dundro. “The funny thing is, fans are disappointed that we can’t play the songs from the CD on stage in mono!”